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Childhood Cancer Ian

Optimistic {About a Brain Tumor?!}

MRI… mass… brain…

(But I thought for sure it must be a problem with his neck…)

You need to go down to Children’s… We’ve already called them… They’re expecting you…

(But this isn’t supposed to happen in my family, not to one of my kids…)

O how sweet the glorious message simple faith may claim
Yesterday, today, forever Jesus is the same.
Still He loves to save the sinful, heal the sick and lame
Cheer the mourner, still the tempest, glory to His Name.

Ian was supposed to go in Friday afternoon for two more scans– MRIs of both his thoracic and his lumbar spine areas. We got a call just after 11 am, they wanted us to come in early, to talk to the doc about Thursday’s MRI results. Thursday. That’s when they did the cervical spine, and the brain twice. That’s when they asked for consent to scan the brain a second time, with contrast, so they could “get a better picture of what’s going on”. Stomach, meet sinking feeling. Sinking feeling, meet stomach.

IT Guy came home from work, and we were at the clinic just after noon. Ian was ushered into a room to wait, while we were ushered into a doctor’s office. She informed us that there is a mass on/in his brain, cerebellum to be a bit more precise. She told us it was/is serious, and that we needed to head down to the Children’s Hospital in Minneapolis. Today. This afternoon. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

We ran home, had the 6 middle children (nursing baby goes where I go) pack some bags to head to my parents’ place (they live close), and then we dropped to our knees together as a family and cried out for His hand of mercy, grace, and protection. Tears were shed and a serious group hug spontaneously erupted, followed by a line forming for individual hugs (I thought that was pretty cute, especially when little Mercy jumped up and clung to her big brother like a little monkey, a really cute blond little monkey) and we were off.

On our way to Children’s.

To the Oncology Clinic.

Crazy. I remember thinking to myself while cruising down 35W, “we’re actually doing this…”

Yesterday, today, forever, Jesus is the same.
All may change, but Jesus never! Glory to His Name!
Glory to His Name! Glory to His Name!
All may change, but Jesus never! Glory to His Name!

None of this came as a surprise to Him.
None of this seemed too hard to Him.

Me, on the other hand? Stunned. Feeling weak and helpless.

When we got to the oncology clinic, we were greeted by a nurse practitioner who said that the neurosurgeon could see us right then, so we were going to take a little walk, and talk on the way.

Okay…

So we walked. To his office across the street and down a block or two. And we talked. Once there, we handed over the DVD with the MRI image files that our clinic had sent with us, and then we started filling out paperwork while the nurse practitioner headed back to look at the MRI images with the neurosurgeon. And then it was time to meet the man that will be cutting the tumor out of my son’s brain…!!!

(cannot believe I just typed that…!!!)

He was pleasant, even smiling. He brought us over to look at the images, and explained some very good news. In his opinion, the mass looks like something that has been there a while. It’s totally amazing to me what they can tell by looking at these images! There are spots of calcification, or something like that, which means that it’s most likely been there quite a long time, and that’s actually really good news, because it means that it’s probably not an aggressively growing tumor. They said we’re looking at something low-grade or benign (praying for benign!!)

Because he is functioning so well (his symptoms have been pretty mild, just enough to ask a question of the doc during his routine sport’s physical) this is not an emergency. I mean, it’s big, it’s serious, but it’s not a surgery tonight kind of emergency. We got to come home, with orders not to skip his friend’s graduation party Saturday night.

The plan for now, is to go back on Tuesday for a special “Stealth MRI”, and then brain surgery on Wednesday. They said to expect a 7-night hospital stay for recovery, followed by some weeks of slowly returning to normal activities. The 12 weeks before any contact sports means missing his senior year soccer season, or at least the majority of it, but when considering how much worse this could be, that’s a small price to pay (though I know it seems much bigger to him!)

That’s today’s story, in a nutshell, or at least in a blog post. And now I’m really tired.

Thanks to everyone who’s been praying. I know He hears. I know He loves us. I know He loves my son more than I ever could. I know he’s in good hands.

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49 Comments

« Pediatricians, MRIs, and Neurologists, Oh My!
Surrender, Now More Than Ever »

Comments

  1. Lara says

    July 30, 2011 at 5:22 am

    I’m sure the emotions will tempt you towards unbelief at times. But I’m praying that He faithfully keeps you. Your family is hemmed in behind and before. With much love and prayers.

    Reply
  2. Katie Orr says

    July 30, 2011 at 5:56 am

    Lord, bring peace. Give the Doctors wisdom. Be glorified in this family!

    Reply
  3. Joy @ Joy In This Journey says

    July 30, 2011 at 6:31 am

    So thankful for good news in a terrifying situation. Praise God it isn’t an emergency! I’ve been there in that “you need to see the doctor RIGHT NOW and you’re bypassing all these other people who’ve been waiting for ages” situation and it’s horrifying. What a blessing that he can attend the party today and you have a few more days to get things in order before surgery next week. I will be praying for you, for him, for the doctors.

    Reply
  4. Sara says

    July 30, 2011 at 7:24 am

    My heart goes out to you and your family during this difficult time. Will be keeping Ian and your family in prayer…

    Reply
  5. rachel @ finding joy says

    July 30, 2011 at 7:38 am

    Praying for you and for your son.

    And remember, I live close, and that Children’s Hospital is the one where I spent most of January with my Samuel. So if you need anything do not hesitate to let me know, okay?

    Praising God for doctors that pursued answers and for solutions. And for peace for all of your hearts.

    Blessings,
    Rachel

    Reply
  6. Heather says

    July 30, 2011 at 8:00 am

    Lord, thank you for good news in the midst of the unfamiliar and uncontrollable. thank you for the security you have given this mother of 8. thank you for a chance for us to come together in prayer for healing and comfort for this sweet family. Thank you that you do not change even though our circumstances do. Amen.

    Reply
  7. Charity says

    July 30, 2011 at 8:25 am

    Praying and crying for you. So glad the doctor is a good one. Love that he said to go to the party this weekend! Wise man!

    Reply
  8. Amy says

    July 30, 2011 at 9:15 am

    Will be praying for him, for you, for the doctor, for the family…

    Reply
  9. Deb @ Counting My Blessings says

    July 30, 2011 at 9:15 am

    Alison, I will be traveling this coming week with Joy and the rest of the Bolivia Bloggers. We will as a team keep Ian in our prayers. May you all be covered with God’s sweet peace and strengthened by His loving presence.

    Reply
  10. Jessica says

    July 30, 2011 at 9:40 am

    Oh wow, I will be praying.

    Reply
  11. jane@flightplatformliving says

    July 30, 2011 at 9:41 am

    oh my goodness!just seen your prayer request on blogfrog! you have mine! xx

    Reply
  12. Kelly says

    July 30, 2011 at 10:56 am

    Praying for complete healing for your son! May Gods unfailing love rest upon you as you put your hope in Him! I pray that He will hold you in the palm of his hands during this difficult time, especially during your sons surgery and recovery. God has the power to heal, He is our Comforter, Our Rock, and Our Shield. I pray He will guide the Dr.’s hands as they care for your son. May you Trust in his Holy Name and Believe in Complete healing and may Gods peace and strength surround you all!

    Reply
  13. Kate says

    July 30, 2011 at 11:00 am

    I am praying for Ian’s complete healing, for strength for you, your husband and your precious family, and for all hands that will be involved in caring for your son.
    I will pray without ceasing, and I will trust in the One who loves him more than we can ever fathom.
    Be strong, sweet sister.

    Reply
  14. Michelle says

    July 30, 2011 at 11:35 am

    I can’t even begin to imagine what you must be going through as a mother right now. I will pray for you, Ian, and your family.

    Reply
  15. Linda says

    July 30, 2011 at 2:00 pm

    Praying for you, Ali. For your entire family. I love the part about your blond monkey clinging to Ian. Thanking God for your beautiful family that makes Him sing so.

    Reply
  16. Bethany says

    July 30, 2011 at 4:19 pm

    Praying you and your family can enjoy this weekend together. That the words of Christ will whisper to your Mama’s heart, your children’s hearts, your husband’s heart. ‘Be strong and of good courage.” “I will never leave you.” I know these words are familiar and true to you from the testimony of your blog. He is with you and my prayers are with you also.

    Reply
  17. Lynn Schott, Founders Academy says

    July 30, 2011 at 6:20 pm

    May the peace that passes understanding guard your hearts and minds. While walking with our daughter on a similar path, I clung to the verse in Psalm, “Yeah, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me.”

    Reply
  18. Karen says

    July 30, 2011 at 6:29 pm

    Oh goodness, Ali. Here I sit, wallowing in the myriad of health issues that threaten to overwhelm us, and I read this! I’m so sorry you’re facing something so frightening. I remember last year when I found out we’d lost our baby, immediately the song “God wants to hear you sing” came to mind..and I thought “surely Lord, you don’t want me to sing NOW” Yes! He did. One of the verses says:

    He loves to hear our praise, on our cheerful days
    When the pleasant times outweigh the bad by far,
    but when troubles come along and we still sing him songs,
    that is when we bless the Father’s heart.

    God wants to hear you sing, when the waves are crashing ’round you
    When the fiery darts surround you, when despair is all you see
    God wants to hear your voice, when the wisest man has spoken
    and says your circumstance is as hopeless as can be.
    that’s when God wants to hear you sing!

    Keep your eyes on Jesus….we’ll be praying for your family.

    Reply
  19. Trooppetrie says

    July 30, 2011 at 7:12 pm

    Praying for my dear friend, not just for her husband but all of the children. For help to arrive when needed, for rest to come when needed, for understanding and peace. for like minded doctors. for strength and for reminders that you are loved and that it is all in God’s control and you are his child and he is holding you tight even when you feel alone.

    Reply
  20. RaD says

    July 30, 2011 at 8:00 pm

    I cannot even imagine, but you are holding the right hand to get through this. I love how you all prayed together as a family. I believe that is the key to facing any hardship. Praying that this is benign and all goes well for him.

    Reply
  21. Becky says

    July 30, 2011 at 9:13 pm

    Praise God that it’s not more malignant! Bringing you before the Lord right now. Thank you so much for letting us in on your life. I am so humbled and honored to be praying for all of you through this. And it is so encouraging to see God’s Word in the midst of all of the fear and unknown that you’ve been through! Praise Him for your faithfulness!

    Reply
  22. Betsy says

    July 30, 2011 at 10:19 pm

    Praying for your family!

    Reply
  23. suzannah {so much shouting, so much laughter} says

    July 30, 2011 at 11:46 pm

    prayers for healing and the deep, all-encompassing shalom of God.

    Reply
  24. nancy says

    July 31, 2011 at 9:29 am

    Prayers for you and your family. Think positive. Hugs to you and yours as well.

    Reply
  25. Beader Bubbe says

    July 31, 2011 at 9:54 am

    Pray and trust in G-d…..if any consolation, a friend of mine was diagnosed with a brain tumor many years ago….she is currently on a cruise to Alaska….doing well….there is hope….my prayers are with you and your family.

    Reply
  26. FireMom says

    July 31, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    Praying for you and yours. 🙁

    Reply
  27. jenn says

    July 31, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Dear Ali and family,
    I wish I could find just the right words to express to you how much Your faith has/is encouraged me. Please know our family is at the throne of our loving Father praying, asking for healing from the ultimate “neurosurgeon!” We love you guys and please let us know if there is anything at all that you need, please ask!!!!

    In Jesus~
    Jenn

    Reply
  28. SaraR says

    July 31, 2011 at 4:52 pm

    Your blog frog post brought me here. I’ll be praying for your son and family.

    Reply
  29. Cara R. says

    July 31, 2011 at 6:46 pm

    I saw your post at Blog Frog. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family, especially your son. May God’s mercy be upon all of you and may it be His will for your son to heal quickly and completely like the tumor was NEVER there! (((Hugs)))

    Reply
  30. Sally Clarkson says

    July 31, 2011 at 7:24 pm

    so very, very sorry. Did not know. We will all be praying for your sweet family.

    Reply
  31. Linds says

    July 31, 2011 at 8:30 pm

    praying for your family during this time!

    Reply
  32. Jenni says

    August 1, 2011 at 5:22 am

    Praying all goes well, especially over the next few days.

    Reply
  33. Sandy says

    August 1, 2011 at 8:23 pm

    Keeping you in my prayers.

    Reply
  34. Candice says

    August 2, 2011 at 9:35 pm

    When my daughter got really sick God gave me this verse. Psalm 1:1,2
    Blessed is he who has regard for the weak;
    The Lord delivers Ian in times of trouble.
    The Lord will protect Ian and preserve Ian life;
    he will bless Ian in the Land
    and not surrender Ian to the desire of his foes.
    This is my prayer for you and your family. Also for contunuial healing
    Candice

    Reply
  35. OneMommy says

    August 4, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    Praying for your son and family right now…. May God guide the surgeon’s hands and may he heal beautifully.

    Reply
  36. Eryn says

    August 4, 2011 at 1:39 pm

    Hi there. I found you via BlogHer and wanted to let you know that, although I don’t share your faith, I’ll be thinking good thoughts for your family. I’ve been here, with my stepfather and a grade four glioma. They said he wouldn’t live more than a few months. That was over two years ago, and his last scan was clean. It’s not an easy road, especially when it’s your child, (Gah!) …but it will be okay.

    Reply
  37. Eryn says

    August 4, 2011 at 1:42 pm

    And I meant “glioblastoma”

    Reply
  38. Elizabeth L. says

    August 4, 2011 at 1:52 pm

    I found this via a BlogHer twitter post. I’m so sorry this is happening to you although it sounds like you are in very good hands with your son’s team of doctors.

    I am praying for you, for your son, and for healing.

    Reply
  39. jenjenk says

    August 4, 2011 at 1:57 pm

    Praying for God’s blessing upon you & your family and that he settles/calms your heart; praying for the surgical team who will be operating on him to give them wisdom and steady hands…

    Reply
  40. Erin says

    August 4, 2011 at 2:54 pm

    Sounds kind of similiar to my husbands tumor. His ended up being a stage 3 oligliodendriglioma (blah, that’s a mouthful!) He had a complete resection in May and is starting his second round of Temador on Sunday night. I know mine isn’t with my child but I’ve been there (at a childrens hospital after brain surgery) with my son also. Saying prayers for you and that he heals quickly. I don’t know that 3 months later I’m still over the shock of hearing brain tumor. Hang in there.

    Reply
  41. kasie says

    August 4, 2011 at 5:06 pm

    I’m praying for your family!

    Reply
  42. Heidi... says

    August 5, 2011 at 3:24 pm

    Found you through blogher… am praying for His divine grace and mercy as well as peace and joy in the journey!

    ~H

    Reply
  43. Natalie says

    August 5, 2011 at 3:43 pm

    Found this on blogher.. Sending HUGE amounts of positive energy your way! Lots of prayers for a safe recovery for your son!

    Reply
  44. Kate says

    August 5, 2011 at 5:59 pm

    Will be thinking of your son, you, and all the rest of your beautiful family. Many, many good thoughts coming your way…

    Reply
  45. Lisa Gsellman says

    August 5, 2011 at 6:33 pm

    Prayers work. So I’ll add mine to the many he has. You will all beat this. At 32, one of my life long friends was diagnosed with a brain tumor, stage four cancer. With a lot of prayers she and the doctors kicked its BUTT! Keep faith.

    Reply
  46. ChristiS says

    August 5, 2011 at 7:44 pm

    Sending many prayers for Ian and your entire family!! Keep your faith…God has it all under control, as you know!! Hold tight to each other!!

    Reply
  47. Heather says

    August 5, 2011 at 10:33 pm

    Sweet Ali,
    I found your blog over at BlogHer, and just wanted to stop by and let you know that I am praying for your son and your family! God is the Great Physician, and I know that He will there with your son and his doctors every step of the way in this process! Hugs and love from Washington!

    Heather

    Reply
  48. Cathy says

    August 6, 2011 at 12:21 am

    As a mom, I’m so sorry you are going through this, I could not imagine if this happened to one of my girls. It did happen to me though. I was diagnosed with a meningioma the size of a chicken egg in Feb. 2010 and chronicled it in my blog: http://www.partialecstasy.com. I’m not sure if you will find any comfort in my own experience but it may answer some questions. The hardest part was the side effects of the medications post-surgery. Thinking of you & your family!

    Reply
  49. Megan says

    August 23, 2011 at 8:09 pm

    Praying for you and your family! I love the words you kept repeating, God is good all the time. My husband has battled cancer and recently we found out he has to again. I find myself repeating similar words to myself all the time. My husband first was diagnosed with cancer when he was 9 y.o. and was cancer free for over 20 years and has come through his most recent battles really well too. Even if the news isn’t perfect, you still have lots to hope for! Always, praying for an all clear! Good luck to you all. 🙂

    Reply

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